Here are phrases that chill the hearts of Metro commuters — “car offloading,” “single tracking,” “track maintenance.” The one I heard yesterday — “schedule adjustment” — elicited no ire, only a wry grin.

Come on! Is Metro running so smartly and speedily and easily that it needs to pause to avoid arriving early? Couldn’t it just be ahead of time for once and put that anomaly in its karmic bank account against future late arrivals?

But no, we sat several minutes or more at some insanely early hour — doors wide open to the wind and to customers who dash into the car breathlessly thinking they’d just made it only to realize that they could have taken their time and sauntered in. It doesn’t take long before they realize that this train isn’t going anywhere for a few minutes — and that now they are part of a schedule adjustment, too.